“Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted.”
- Randy Pausch
Red Pill Parents, it’s late at night, but this was just too good/important/uplifting/moving not to share with you immediately! I just finished watching this 1 hour 16 minute lecture by Randy Pausch, the Carnegie Mellon professor who is most famous for this Last Lecture video. Randy is no longer with us, his life claimed by pancreatic cancer, but his words and life lessons are the gift and the catalyst of thought that he has left for us all.
Based on Randy’s words, I have definitely earned a lot of experience! I spent most my of my teens, twenties and part of my thirties working with bands on my quest to become a rock star and have worked building my own record label, as well as doing internet marketing at Jive Records for Britney Spears, The Backstreet Boys and N*sync. As a record producer in search of the elusive hit record, I had the opportunity to experience life through the eyes of artists from all around the world. Along the way, I have found ways to channel much of what I have learned from these experiences into my role as a father, which in many ways feels more substantial and meaningful, as a person about to turn 40, than the egotistical pursuit of being a ‘rock star.’ Instead of spending my time touring and being away from home, I am blessed with the ability to watch my daughter develop day by day and can teach her about being open-minded to the cultures, religions, and practices of the diverse cultures of the world, as well as offering her lessons in the simple joys of playing music and the improvisational skils that lead to the creation of songs and melodies. I am blessed with the opportunity to play music for her kindergarten class, as I did this past Friday, and watch the eyes of 5-year-old children light up as they have many musical firsts.
While I can only imagine what it would have been like to play music night after night in front of screaming fans as I traveled the world, I have witnessed first hand how my dreams have transformed into new goals, and how the passions and hobbies that we continue to invest time in become mines of riches from which to spark our childrens’ imaginations.
Sometimes it is a hard pill to swallow, as I see time pass by and the possibilities of realizing my particular dream dim, but my relationship to music and my vast knowledge of wonderful songs and artists is now something that I can share with my daughter and offer to her as she forms her picture of the world. To hear the words of someone like Randy Pausch, who has been able to achieve many of his childhood dreams, I do not find feelings of jealousy creeping up, but rather find myself inspired by the insights he has gained and the message that he has to share with us from his particular vantage point. Remember that Randy, when he delivered this lecture, and for many years prior, had been fighting a disease that does not have a good long-term prognosis. How many times have we heard stories of people stepping on the gas and taking account of their lives when they know their time with their loved ones is limited? In reality, all of us are living with this deadline, but until we have a clear time frame, it is human nature to think ‘there’s always time for that to happen,’ or ‘I will get to it one day.’ What Randy has given us is a clear lens and lesson through which we can do some soul-searching and, hopefully, clarify thoughts and feelings within ourselves to find the peace and the plan that will enable us to be the best parents that we can possibly be.
If you decide to watch this video, I hope you can give yourself time to watch to the very end. I promise that all of us parents will have many take-aways and epiphanies as a result of hearing Randy’s words and feeling his infectious energy and spirit. I hope you’ve enjoyed hearing mine.
I discovered this video on the www.ted.com web site. If you are not yet familiar with Ted Talks, I suggest that you bookmark it. Then, forget about what’s on TV for a while and return to this site every time you feel you need a little tube. There are so many fascinating and mind-expanding lectures on this site, of varying lengths (I know this one is long) by famous and unknown intellectuals, authors, business leaders, entertainers, doctors, community leaders, et al to jump start your mind and get you up-to-speed on all of the issues of the day and of the future. www.ted.com is most definitely a Red Pill Parent-approved site.
Watch Randy Pausch: Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams below or click here to visit the ted.com web site.
For more information on Randy Pausch visit the Carnegie Mellon Randy Pausch Page or Randy’s personal site.
